Wir sind NICHT Berlinern.

In June 1963, President John F. Kennedy stood on the western side of the newly-erected Berlin Wall and summarized America's support for and solidarity with Western Berlin, declaring, "Ich bin ein Berliner!" The former President did not mean he was a doughnut, although many people like to joke about that one. He was actually being technically correct to a T -- he was not a citizen of Berlin, but a comrade. Ein Berliner. COME ON PEOPLE.

After Zeke, Liam, and I spent a day in Berlin back in early May, we unanimously agreed that we are fans of Bavaria, Franconia, and Bamberg... not Berlin.  Berlin seemed more like a glorified, expansive Detroit.  The streets weren't clean, the people weren't social (even for German standards), and the "sights to see" were swarming with shady skeezes. We were humbled and proud to see the remnants of the Wall and Checkpoint Charlie, but we were so excited to get back home to our beautiful surroundings.

Riding in style... as always

Our first stop was on Jesse Owens Drive -- a view of the Olympic Stadium. I didn't learn this fact until writing this blog, but the tradition of carrying the Olympic torch as a precursor to the Games was started here in Berlin in 1936. The torch was lit by sunlight in Olympia and carried by 3,000 different relay runners the distance to Berlin. This year, the torch made its final approach into London via David Beckham's speedboat... not exactly the same commute, but it's in the spirit of the tradition, right?

The Olympic Stadium (site of the 1936 Olympic Games, where Jesse Owens made history)

View of Berlin from the Olympic bell tower -- the skyline is peppered with nuclear power plants, which will be shut down within a few years if Merkel's plan is successful

Reproduced Olympic Bell (original is just outside the stadium), branded with a depiction of Brandenburg Gate, the Imperial eagle, and the inscription, "Ich rufe die Jugend der Welt," or "I call the youth of the world"

The bell tower atop Langemarck Halle (controversially named for and dedicated to student soldiers killed in Belgium in WWI)

Our tour guide informed us that this particular branch of beliefs has such little support in Berlin that those running the organization can't afford to keep the lights on

A military ceremony we had the fortune of stumbling upon; our group also had the chance to shake the new mayor's hand (although we personally didn't)

No introduction needed, I hope

See above

Again, see above  :)

SO HANDSOME. As Maralyn told me right after Zeke proposed, I am "one lucky b*tch"

Rome has made its imprint everywhere, hasn't it? (Disregard the weird black circle and rectangle on the bus window)

Our second stop was Checkpoint Charlie, the most famous checkpoint separating East and West Berlin. It was here where Soviet and American tanks faced off mere feet from one another (and inches from raising the temperature of the Cold War drastically).

Just outside Checkpoint Charlie, select portions of the Wall are on display

This one rocked me emotionally -- our tour guide told us just how accurate this painting was, as his own family was severed by the Wall

Seriously? There is a movement now to upgrade the sanctity of Checkpoint Charlie and remove such commercialism from the nearby blocks

Checkpoint Charlie and its museum. On the West side, a large picture of an American soldier is displayed. On the reverse, a picture of a Soviet soldier greets those on the East side

We were thisclose to buying this fab little Soviet number. At least we have a picture to immortalize the moment

"O-M-G I am standing on THE WALL!!"

More of the Wall, still standing (though it is heavily chipped away)

Our next stop was the area surrounding Brandenburg Gate. Just beyond where our bus stopped was a unique Holocaust memorial:

Dedicated to the Jews murdered during Hitler's reign -- the ground is unbalanced throughout and the blocks vary in size and height to give passersby an incredibly unstable and unsettled feeling

...well, almost every passerby. Liam seems perfectly fine with The Land of Really Cool Blocks

Liam demanded we take a picture of the American flag. I love that this beautiful symbol of freedom and liberty flies in just about every single corner of the world

Brandenburg Gate

Our final stop where we were left to roam the city was the main train station in Berlin. The day we were in town was the day of a HUGE soccer game -- and the raucous fans were already drunk by midday and threatening the Polizei. Unfortunately for the fans, the Polizei were not in the mood and were heavily armed (we mean heavily -- think American police during the Civil Rights protests and various big-city riots). At one point, the enormous crowd surged as the Polizei came in with their large plastic shields to tote away the worst offenders.

Look for the green helmets. WHOA.

Liam slept through the riots

A very organized drinker (common in Germany) -- he should get this keg tote patented!

Polizei awaiting the next drunken stumble by a soccer fan

After snaking through the crowd, we found a decent restaurant (which was serving Thanksgiving-style food, so odd) and then bought a delicious pastry at Dunkin' Donuts. Now that's my kind of Berliner.

Once we got home, we breathed in our fresh, clean, Bavarian air, and thanked our lucky stars that we weren't put on a base anywhere near Deutschland Detroit.

Wir sind NICHT Berlinern, for sure. But it's good to have that confirmed.